We all feel angry sometimes, and often for good reason!

But anger can start to be a problem when you express it through destructive behaviour, either towards yourself or others.

Feeling angry can be scary and overwhelming, and difficult to put into words. It can be a response to feeling scared, stressed or things not happening as expected, either right now or in your past. You may even feel angry and not know why you feel that way.

How does anger make you feel?

Anger can be overwhelming and make it hard to think properly.

If you’re angry a lot of the time, it can be hard to look at what is making you feel angry and communicate that with others.

Angry can make you:

  • Tense up and clench your teeth
  • Your heart pump faster
  • Your stomach churn
  • Clench your fists

After getting angry you might start to feel guilty about how you acted, which can make you feel worse.

If you notice you’re doing these sorts of things regularly, it may be a sign that you would benefit from some support:

  • Physically hurting other people, such as kicking or hitting
  • Shouting at people
  • Breaking things
  • Losing control
  • Spending time with people who get you into trouble
  • Getting into trouble at school or work

How can I manage my anger?

It’s ok to take some time to think about what is making you angry.

You might find it helpful to keep a diary of what’s triggered this emotion and how you overcame it.

You may also find it useful to talk to somebody you trust about how you have been feeling and how it is affecting your life.

Here are some tips for managing anger:

Give yourself time to think before reacting – try taking some deep breaths or counting to 10.

What happened? How did you respond? How did you feel after? Is there anything that is upsetting you?

You may find it handy to write these thoughts down or to make a voice recording on your phone.

Talk about how you are feeling with someone that you trust.

Click here for advice on starting conversations or here to access a helpline or support service.

Do something that makes you feel different to angry – you could go for a walk, read a book or listen to some music.

Activities such as walking, swimming and yoga can help you to relax. Try to do something you enjoy!

Try a relaxation or mindfulness activity.

How can I get help?

If you still aren’t able to manage your anger, you may want to speak to a specialist about your feelings and behaviour.

Find out more about how to access our Emotional Wellbeing & Mental Health services.